New Year's Safety

It's New Year's Eve, boys n' girls.

If you drink, you're gonna drink responsibly. Right?

If you drink and get totally 'faced, you're gonna crash at your friend's house or take a cab home. Right?

One of you is going to happily give up the sauce and be the designated driver. Right?

Right!



Have a safe and happy New Year!

Sleep Schmeep

It's 4 AM on our last day in Vegas and I'm waiting for room service.

I can sleep back in L.A.

Did everyone have a nice Christmas? Mine was awesome. Good food, courtesy of Emeril Lagasse. Good gaming, courtesy of the Las Vegas strip. Good fun, courtesy of my family. Good surreal experience, courtesy of Madame Toussaud's Wax Museum in the Venetian hotel.

If you ever have a chance to see George Wallace in concert, do it. One of the funniest people alive today.

Wii Ain't Just For People

Apparently cats dig it, too.

Link

D**k In A Box

An SNL Digital Short from the recent episode hosted by Justin Timberlake.

Rude, but hysterical.

Link (via YouTube)

Who's Going To Vegas?

We're going to Vegas!! For Christmas, baybeeee...



We already did Xmas with the Hawaii family over Thanksgiving. We did the Xmas thing with my parents a few weekends ago.

So now it's just Xmas with me, my wife, my brother-in-law, the video poker machines, the lights, the glitz, the glamour. Yeah!

Wanna see what we're having for Xmas dinner? Delmonico Steak House at the Venetian. It's one of Emeril Lagasse's restaurants and the food will. kill. you. dead. (it's THAT good).

Sentences You'd NEVER Expect To See In Your Lifetime

"NEW YORK (Reuters) - Actress
Natasha Lyonne, the star of "American Pie" accused of threatening to sexually molest a dog, turned herself in at a New York court on Friday."

The whole story (via Yahoo News):

"American Pie" actress turns herself in at NY court

Seven Sinful Santas

Entertainment Weekly's website posted a list of seven movie and TV Santa's that fit the mold of the Seven Deadly Sins.

Funny stuff.

Link

iPod

I finally bought an iPod. Got all greedy and nabbed an 80 GB one. It's awesome. I can jump around from song-to-song like a kid hopped up on candy. The shuffle feature is perfect for scatterbrained people like me.



Plus, I "borrowed" my wife's Bose SoundDock to play the thing at work. Niiiiiiice.



I've already filled up 6 GBs, including the album artwork. I should have it completely filled up by the time I'm 70.

Yeeeeah!

Wii: It's All Fun Until You Put An Eye Out

Apparently the straps on the Wii controller aren't all that secure. While you're wailin' and a-flailin' at the TV, the straps sometimes come loose or break free, turning your controller into a wicked-fast projectile of destruction.



There's already a site dedicated to documenting the level of destruction these "missiles" can unleash. I think it's only a matter of time before the military starts using them.

Link

Horny Manatee

Thank you Conan O'Brian.

The Internet is now complete.

www.hornymanatee.com

Nintendo Wii - Japanese Manual

Funny Stuff.



Link (via BoingBoing)

Vacation Teaser

I'm not going to get into the details of our Hawaiian vacation yet, but here's some tasty tidbits:

1. Flew on Thanksgiving, which meant the flight to Hawaii was half empty.
2. Due to a couple of snafus, we ended up in a Penthouse suite at a hotel in Waikiki with a veranda overlooking the whole city and a full East to West view of the ocean.
3. The beach house was awesome. Walk out the back door, across the lawn, down the stairs and into the ocean for a swim. A CLEAN ocean, mind you.
4. Saw several spots where Lost was filmed!
5. They filmed part of an episode right down the street from where we were staying. My sister-in-law heard gunshots!
6. Flew back First Class, which was very comfy.

I'm already ready to go back.

What Motiviation?

Ever gone on a really good vacation? One where you totally relax, hang with family you haven't seen in a year, just chill and recuperate from the toils of daily life?

Then once it's all done, you go to work?

And you find "motivation" is an elusive beast?

Welcome to my Tuesday.

It's like trying to start a car engine that's been cold for too long. I'm moving along at about 70% power right now. I think by Thursday, I should be back into the swing of things.

Aloha!

Back from Hawaii. It was beyond wonderful. In fact it was so wonderful that I have nothing to blog about 'cuz my brain is still on vacation!

Pictures n' stuff to follow...

"Celebrity" Is A Form Of Insanity

Looks like "Seinfeld"'s Michael Richards just graduated from the Mel Gibson School Of Religious And Racial Tolerance:

"Seinfeld" star Richards under fire for racial outburst



Somebody there videotaped the outburst, which was aired on a local news program this morning. Offensive and sad.

Humanity Regains An Element Of Sanity

News Corp. cancels O.J. Simpson book

What a huge travesty that would have been had the book and TV special continued. It's one thing for Fox to air specials of animals attacking people and disgruntled employees urinating in customer's cups of coffee, but to air this? I still scoff at the title: "If I Did It". Whaddaya mean "If"?

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt, bucko.

Wanna See A Grown Man Cry?

Kansas man shoots himself in groin

GOOD Music

Went on a spending frenzy at Amoeba Music a few nights ago.

Picked up "What It Is! Funky Soul and Rare Grooves".



A four CD box of rare funk and obscure soul.

This box is AWESOME. If you like that funk sound from 1967 through 1977 from the likes of Curtis Mayfield, Allan Toussaint, Little Richard, Earth Wind n' Fire, as well as more obscure talent like Baby Huey & The Baby Sitters and Black Haze Express, this box'll blow you away.

Right on, baby.

Pronunciation Counts

A few weeks ago I downloaded a GPS program into my cell phone. It's awesome. As long as the satellites way up in the sky can find me I'll never get lost, even in cities I only visit once in awhile or have never visited before.

This program gives you real time driving directions. The satellites (you know... the ones way up in the sky) keep track of you while you drive and a synthetic female voice tells you when to turn and how far to drive.

Again: awesome.

Sometimes, however, the voice has problems with pronunciation. Especially with Spanish words.

For example:

Last weekend we went to San Diego and needed to drop my brother-in-law off at La Jolla Village Road in La Jolla.

We humans pronounce it "(LAH HOY-yah) Village Road."

The voice, on the other hand, pronounced it "Louisiana (JOL-lah) Village Road."

It took us several seconds to realize what the voice was saying. I could understand her saying (JOL-lah) -- most voice synthesizers speak phonetically. But "Louisiana"?

It finally dawned on me. "La" is the abbreviation for Louisiana. The voice only said this when we were on the freeway. Once off the freeway, she pronounced it "la". Apparently when you're on the freeway, any word that matches a state abbreviation must mean the state and not a Spanish pronoun.

I'm going to Hawaii in a few weeks. We're going to have fun having the voice pronounce various Hawaiian city and street names like "Likelike" (LEE-kay LEE-kay), "Hoopio" (ho-oh-PEE-oh) and "Kaaawa" (kah-ah-AH-va)...

Wow... Democracy REALLY Works!

Forgot to mention that the Democrats won the Senate, too.

And in two years we can top off this tasty brew with the Presidency, too!

Blogger Beta

I've converted to the NEW Blogger (Beta).

I feel all new and shiny.

Can you smell that new car smell?

(Doesn't the term "Beta" mean something's gonna break?)

Whaddaya Know... Democracy Still Works

The Democrats have control of the House of Representatives and are within striking distance of the Senate.

And now Rumsfeld has resigned.

While a Democratic Congress vs. a Republican White House will most likely mean a total governmental stalemate for the next two years, that's much, much, much better than the ass-whuppin' we've been getting from our own government since 2000.

There's actually some hope!

What Would This World Be Without People?

A LOT less interesting, for sure.

Naked man with secreted awl arrested (via BoingBoing)

Blank

Wow... have you ever experienced one of those times where you would like to post something profound and life altering and all you come up with is... *BLANK*.



I haven't come across anything WOW-ish on the 'net for awhile.

Lesse, what can I muster up?

- Celebrated another birfday. Things are starting to creak, but nothing's fallen off yet.

- Confused a girl at Starbucks. I was in the drive-thru listening to Yes' "Fragile". When I pulled up to the window the girl asked what I was listening to. I said "Yes". She gave me this odd look and stammered out a "what?". I again said "Yes". She looked even more perplexed and told me that she didn't know what I meant. So I helped her out by describing the band as "The opposite of No". That's when a big, bright, shiny light bulb popped on over her head. All this time, she thought I had been saying "Guess".

- Still going to Hawaii the day after Thanksgiving. YAY! We're going to try and fly first class. BIGGER YAY! I got a new pair of Bose headphones to use on the plane. EVEN BIGGER YAY!

Okay, stuff did happen. So... how you doin'?

Spongbob Will Lure Your Kids Into Danger

For SpongeBob, 3-year-old sacrifices freedom (at least temporarily)

The headline speaks for itself.

Computers Are Trying To Kill Us

Think the Matrix is just a fantasy...?

Obedient driver follows orders, crashes car (via Yahoo News)

A Nice Night

You know what makes for a nice night?

Sitting outside surfing the web while one of your cats sleeps on her little chair next to the front door. THAT is a good night.

Did you know all of our cats have MySpace pages? You do now.

Come. Meet the furballs:

Elua (We call him Little Wonka) - his name's Hawaiian for "Second". Found him at a local pet store. My wife took pity on him because, in a cage full of hyper, playful cats, he slept forlornly in the corner. The second we left the pet store, he perked up, making us realize we had been duped. Link

Ku'ulani (however, she's the Bahby Girl to us) - her name's Hawaiian for "My Heaven". She joined us from a local animal shelter. We didn't choose her. She chose us. (Huh? You ask). Have you ever gone to an animal shelter and visited the cat room? All the cats stare at you with wide, fearful eyes. Not her. She rubbed against the bars, purring. She knew we had finally arrived to pick her up. Link

Fluffy - black as midnight. Gay as West Hollywood. Yes, he's a gay cat. With a voracious appetite. He's eaten everything from beef (no surprise), to salad (a little surprised), to tortilla chips (okay, that was a surprise). Link

Millie - a muted Calico. In other words, she has normal Calico markings but instead of bold blacks, oranges, and whites, she's full of greys, beiges, and whites. She's just an odd cat. Probably dropped on her head as a kitten while we weren't looking. Runs and hides for no reason and loves to stare at the ceiling. Link

Things You Learn Surfing Blogger

It's one of those nights. I should be sleeping (I DO have work tomorrow), but instead I'm randomly hopping from blog to blog using Blogger's "Next Blog" button.

Here's some things I've learned purely by random:

1. California is the 47th smartest state in the union (out of 50, mind you)! Yay! We be stoooopid. (Link)

2. Some quilts are very pretty. (Link)

3. Cats are cute. (That's why we have four of them.) (Link)

4. Hey, puppies are cute, too. Even if you can't speak Dutch. (Link)

5. You like humidifiers? Wanna be a humidifier guru? (Link)

6. I even found the BESTEST. BLOG. OF. ALL. TIME!!!! (Apparently). (Link) [Wow...this site actually hijacks the Next Blog button if you use that button to navigate from the site. Now it's the BESTEST. NEXT. BLOG. BUTTON. EVER!!! *snarf*]

Okay. That's enough for now.

Who's Going To Hawaii?

WE'RE GOING TO HAWAII!

In November - one week - one beach house.

Wanna see? Of COURSE you wanna see (courtesy of my wife).

No work. No responsibilities. Hopefully, no earthquakes (we'll leave ours at home). Just ocean, rest, and family.

Aloooooooha.

(and it's pronounced Kah-ah-AH-va. No kaaaaaaava. Not ka'a'a'a'a'ava (like a goat).)

The Kids Just Love "Enter Sandman"

So I'm doing laundry at a nearby laundromat and, thumbing through the latest L.A. Weekly, I come across an ad for what has to be the oddest CDs ever made:





That's right! Lullaby versions of some of your favorite metal and prog bands. They also have ones for Coldplay and The Beach Boys. I could understand a lullaby version of The Beach Boys working, but... Tool?

Can't wait the lullaby versions from Nirvana ("Smells Like Infant Spirit" ??) and The Sex Pistols.

Your Final Meal

Deep-fried Coca-Cola

Kiss them arteries goodbye!

Aloha Tower Records

Wow. Tower Records is kaput.

Link (via L.A. Times)

The winning bidder was a liquidation company that's going to spend the next six weeks attempting to eliminate the chain's inventory. Sure, it could be a few weeks of super cheap music, but still it's kind of sad.

While I tend to frequent Amoeba a lot more since it moved in, I always had a soft spot for Tower, which seemed a cut above the other records stores in Los Angeles (like Wherehouse, Sam Goody's, Musicland, Licorice Pizza...). The Sunset Strip store is an L.A. landmark.



The Strip is going to be a little bit emptier now...

Lost! Lost! LOST!!

Lost is back! Lost is back! Lost is back!



The season premier was hella good.

Finally, a reason to continue owning a television!!

Iggy Pop's Rider

I know this has already started spreading like wildfire through the blogosphere but I'm going to link to it also.

This is a concert rider for Iggy Pop and the Stooges penned by one of his roadies, Jos Grain. It's hysterical.



If all legal documents were written like this, we'd be a much happier planet.

Link (via The Smoking Gun)

Sticky Situation

You know when you buy a CD or a DVD and they come with the little sticky security strips at the top (or in the case of DVDs, on the top, the side, and the bottom)?

Is there any way to remove them without leaving huge strips of really, really, REALLY sticky stuff that stays on for weeks? I just bought a new DVD today and after removing all the security strips, the box is now slathered in super sticky glue.

I think they use the same glue that's used on bumper stickers.

What's worse is I have four cats. Cats that shed. Shed fur that tends to float around. Float around near the DVDs and CDs. The ones with sticky glue residue. Nothing like grabbing a CD off the shelf to find the top of the jewel box covered in fur.

Irony

From ABC News.com:


Congressman Mark Foley, Republican from Florida, resigned today just hours after ABC news questioned him about a series of sexually explicit instant messages involving current and former underage male Congressional pages. Foley used the login name Maf54.

Maf54: Do I make you a little horny ?
Teen: A little. Maf54: Cool.

Foley was the chairman of the house caucus on missing and exploited children and has long crusaded for tough laws against those who use the Internet for sexual exploitation of children.


Sad.

Tequila!

Danny Flores, the guy who played sax and shouted "Tequila!" on the song of the same name has died.

Pee-Wee Herman fans worldwide mourn the loss.



Story

Amazing Race!!!

You can take your Big Brother *. You can keep your Survivor **.

The Amazing Race is back on. This is the king of reality shows. A race around the world. The fun of watching twelve teams of hapless Americans bickering, whining, and flaunting "American cultural superiority" in the face of "lesser" cultures.

Watching people raised on Wonder Bread and Miracle Whip grimmacing as they gulp down fish eyeballs to continue. Watching out-of-shape city folk attempt to climb a portion of the Great Wall of China, chanting the mantra "I can't do this!!!" over and over again. Watching a couple who said their relationship is solid turn into bickering kids over which direction the next Pit Stop is. Watching the English-speaking-only racers think the way to communicate to someone who doesn't speak the language is to TALK. LOUDER. AND. SLOWER..

This is brilliant television.

* I dunno about Big Brother. Once the two most deserving people, Will and Janelle, were kicked out, I could have cared less who won. Boogie only made it to the end on Will's coattails and Erika didn't deserve to win because she's just scary to look at and whiny to boot.

** Is it me or did the whole "race card" twist this season fall flat on its face right from the start? I had a feeling the producers were hoping the island would erupt into a race war with opposing teams trying to terrorize each other with drive by fish spearings and Molotov coconuts. Instead, everyone acknowledged that they were divided by race, then proceeded to get along just fine and act like every, single other Survivor competetor in the past. I get it -- we could end racial conflict by dumping everyone on an island and offer a cash prize of a million dollars and fifteen minutes of fame!

Star Wars Episode III - The Backstroke of the West

Check out these screengrabs of "Star Wars Episode III - The Revenge of the Sith" from a bootleg Chinese DVD.

The subtitles are hilarious.

Link

9/11 - Five Years Later

It's been five years since this awful event and the governments of the world still make life miserable for everyone, waging wars, perpetuating poverty, doing everything they can to destroy hope, and existing in insular, greedly little cliques whose only motivation is their own petty needs.

It's also a testament to the goodness and tenacity of humanity that, in spite of our governments, we still survive and manage to remain happy and hopeful.

We should live every day like it's September 12th, when everyone came together with a shared purpose of helping those who had suffered so much. We should never forget that we are capable of such a gracious and caring spirit.

In spite of our governments, that is.

Nominee: Album Title of the Year

The new one from Yo La Tengo:

"I Am Not Afraid of You and I Will Beat Your Ass"

Brilliant.

Nominee For Politically Incorrect Blog

My wife found this and passed it along.

Tard Blog

This is the musings and rantings of a special ed teacher. On the surface this reads like a very politically incorrect treatise on the mentally disabled. However, I got the feeling that she enjoyed what she did but needed this blog as a way to blow off steam.

Then again, the blog hasn't been updated since July 2005, so she could be happily working a complete different job.

Pluto Is Not A Planet

Pluto is a dog.



Apparently scientists have re-written the laws of the Universe and now Pluto no longer qualifies as a planet.

Link (via Yahoo)

If I were Pluto, I'd hire some lawyers quick and sue for slander and/or libel.

Um...

From Yahoo:

Police crack down on striptease funerals...

Animator vs. Animation

A Flash developer put together a Flash of a stick figure waging war against the animator himself.

Hysterical.

Link (via BoingBoing)

Death By Chocolate

If I had to get injured in a work-related accident, this is what I would choose:

US man survives chocolate ordeal

Leonid The Magnificent

(from America's Got Talent)

Sometimes a picture is worth a 1,000 words.



In this case, each of those words is pure gibberish.

Why L.A. Is Loopy - One In A Series

Occasional observations on why Los Angeles is sometimes the lunatic capital of the world.

We have a local radio station, STAR 98.7, that, for the past few months, has been having the traffic guy SING the traffic report. At first the poor thing had to do it EVERY time. Now it's only by request. The thing is, the requests come often. I feel bad for the guy -- he can't sing, yet he gamely tries. The songs are well known songs but sound like they're being played on one of those old-school Casio keyboards. It always reminds me of some poor kid who just wants to play quietly in his room but gets paraded out every time the relatives come over to perform his rendition of "Greensleeves" on his recorder.

The morning DJs also played a little game of "Cute or Creepy" where callers would offer some tidbit about their lives and the DJs would determine if that tidbit was cute or creepy. The only one I heard was about a boyfriend who liked to videotape cute TV weathergirls and watch them over and over as well as taking detailed notes about them.

Um. That's not creepy. That's sociopathic. That's the kind of person who, if you visited their childhood home, you'd find polished dog and cat skulls buried in the backyard.

The Bounty Huntaaaaah

I'm watching a Dog, The Bounty Hunter marathon. I've been to Hawaii numerous times (my wife is from Hawaii) so it's been fun playing "Hey, I've been there before" with the different locations.

Janelle: Big Brother

Okay...



I'm now officially convinced that she has sold her soul to the Devil. How else can you explain the extraordinary luck she has. In a series of flukes with bad buzzers, etc, she's now the Head of Household AFTER winning a critical Power of Veto last week to prevent her more than obvious eviction.

Nobody is that naturally lucky...

Iron Chef: America vs. Japan

Just finished watching Iron Chef America.

Tonight's special ingredient? Puff Pastry.

This show is excellent in demonstrating the schism between American and Japanese pallets. Some of the items in America? Puff Pastry, Hamburger, Spinach, etc.

Japan? Dried Cuttlefish, Giant Eel, Konnyaku (Fermented Japanese Root Paste). Mmmm.

I like the Japanese version better, actually. It's for one reason - the overly literal translations. The peeps translating Japanese to English aren't so much translating as they're ACTING! Even down to the mmmmms and ahhhhhs as they taste the food. Hysterical. Keeps you from gagging as they attempt to produce five dishes with the special ingredient of rat testicles.

Hey, I did get to meet Hiroyuki Sakai while he was visiting Waikiki promoting his signature brand of coffee (good coffee, btw).

MTV - The Cure For The Common Marriage

I already mentioned the end of two MTV marriages - Jessica n' Nick, and more recently, Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler - in the previous post.

Now MTV has claimed a third victim - Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra.

Link (via Yahoo News)

I can hear future angry couples screaming "I want my MTV!!".

MTV Is The New Irreconcilable Difference

First the Simpsons, now...

TRAVIS BARKER FILES FOR DIVORCE

BLINK-182/TRANSPLANTS drummer TRAVIS BARKER has filed for divorce from his wife (and "Meet the Barkers" co-star) SHANNA MOAKLER. MTV cameras captured the couple's marriage and home life -- beginning with their Halloween-eve wedding ceremony -- for two seasons, beginning last spring. Last month, the couple quietly placed their 12,000-square-foot Tuscan villa in Bel Air, California, on the market for $8.5 million. "My only concern right now is for the welfare and best interests of my children," Moakler told "People" through her publicist. Barker and Moakler are the latest in a string of celebrity couples who've split since having their marriages documented on MTV, joining the company of Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra, and Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey.

From RollingStone.com

The Mind At 12:35 AM

I'm surfing other Blogger sites, cliking the "Next Blog" button to see what randomly comes up.

One site showed an infant sitting in what is called a Jolly Jumper. It's pretty much a bouncy harness suspended from a doorway. You stick junior in the harness/seat and they happily bounce about.

Don't you wish sometimes that they made an adult sized version? Some days, when life gets too crazy, there'd be nothing more relaxing than spending an hour bouncing in a doorway.

Check out the Talking Heads' video for "Stay Up Late" -- the band spends have the video in Jolly Jumpers.

If I didn't have to run a process for work right now, I'd be sleeping.

Thank you for your support.

Lance Bass Is Gay

Link (Yahoo News)

In other shocking events:

- The sun is bright.
- Food tastes good.
- Summer is hot.
- The sky is blue.
- Cats meow.

In other words: Duh

Summer Bummer

There's a long-running joke in L.A. about Summer. Whereas other cities usually spend Summer suffering in heat mixed with massive lung-clogging, sweat-preventing humidity, L.A. Summers are dry.

On a hot day, you'll usually hear the comment: "Yes, it's hot. But it's a dry heat".

Well, today's "dry heat" felt hot enough to make small children spontaneously burst into flame, turn swimming pools into boiling pots of water, and successfully burn away any will to live beyond the comfort of air conditioning.

Today, Burbank was 110 degrees. One hundred TEN degrees. A record. Burbank usually doesn't get any hotter than 99 degrees during a normal summer. And 110 degrees was on the coolish side. Woodland Hills, smack at the west end of the San Fernando Valley (or as I'm calling it, Death Valley Part Deux), hit 119 (119!!!!) degrees.

This stuff's gotta end and it's gotta end SOON. This ain't dry heat. This is die heat.

Human Space Invaders

D'oh! - The video was removed at the owner's request. Pity. It was a cool video

From the world of viral videos.

This is WAY too awesome.



Link (YouTube.com)

According to BoingBoing.Net, this took four hours to film.

Finally! The Internet Explained!

Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska finally explains the Internet for all us clueless humans.



(Think "a series of tubes").

Link (from BoingBoing)

4th of July Irony

One of the many 4th of July specials on TV tonight was something called "An American Celebration at Ford's Theatre".

Um... didn't President Lincoln get assassinated at Ford's Theatre?

Is this a venue that you would want to celebrate an American holiday at? You SURE this is a venue you'd want the President to attend?

What's the special going to be next year? "An American Celebration at Baghdad, Iraq"??

Pants Off Dance Off !!!

Saw this on "The Best Week Ever", then there was a mention of it on EW.com.

Ordinary schlubs strip to music videos for YOUR vote!

This pretty much seals the argument that TV is bad for you.

Link (at your own risk)

And Now A PSA...

...to stop car bombings in Iraq.

Yes, Hollywood is putting together a PSA (apparently at the cost of a cool million) to encourage terrorists from exploding car bombs.

Here's the link at BoingBoing.net

Using a PSA to stop car bombings will be as effective as telling hard-core drug addicts to "Just Say No". I'm consistently amazed at how clueless people are when it comes to tackling a serious problem. Instead of asking "What is driving these people to explode bombs in cars and kill lots of people", they just come up with some easy way to combat it. It's like telling a person who's bleeding to death to just think happy and healthy thoughts instead of getting them bandages and applying pressure to the wound.

Crazy.

13 Unpopular TV Characters

From The Onion AV Club:

Link

I don't agree with all of them and think the order of the rankings could be a little different, but they're definitely dead-on with a lot of them.

6/6/06

So, 6/6/06 is almost done and nobody burst into flames, I didn't see demons n' devils parading down the street, the sky didn't turn plaid, cats didn't start shooting lasers out of their eyes (thankfully), people didn't sprout extra apendages, the music I listened to didn't have satanic messages in it either forwards or backwards.

In other words, pretty normal day.

I'm disappointed.

I would have liked to have seen at least ONE cat shoot laserbeams out of its eyes (just not mine).

Save Starting Over - Part III

No word yet on the fate of the show, but the phone call and online petition campaigns are getting significant notice.

Daytime Reality TV Fans Try to Save Show

Keep it going!!

Lost

Alright, kiddies. Lost just completed its second season and now I get to weigh in
with what I think is going on:

This is what we've learned:

• The button WAS important. Apparently, it helps vent built up magnetic energy due to an crack in the Swan station.
• Desmond's neglect brought 815 down.
• Henry Gale (or NotHenry, as he's being referred to on many boards) is an important Other.
• There's a way to get to freedom (presumably... Mr. Gale's not known for telling the truth).
• The outside world still exists and can pick up massive electromagnetic pulses.

So, given that, here's my latest theory:

• The island is cloaked. Most likely by the magnetic field, which I think existed long before the Dharma project got there. In fact, I think its the islands "unique" energy that attracted the Dharma Initiative in the first place. That would explain why very old boats (in other words, The Black Rock) were there.
• Locke, Eko, and Desmond aren't dead. That bright light wasn't really an explosion. I think the "fail safe" was a way to fully discharge or blow away the magnetic field. Hence, the busted hatch door was repelled by the polarity reversal.
• Widmore is bankrolling the whole thing.
• The mysterious food drop a few episodes earlier -- given the cloaking properties of the magnetic field prevented the plane from being seen or heard. Yet, they had the ability to pierce the field to make the drop -- just like how Henry told Michael the proper location to get free, there may be other weak spots in the shield.

What's totally throwing me is: what's up with the four-toed statue foot?

Save Starting Over - Part II

From www.startingovertalk.com:

NBC has created a special viewer line for Starting Over --- 818-777-0244. If viewers wish to call to voice their opinion regarding Starting Over this is THE BEST number to call. All calls will be logged and counted. Callers MUST call 818-777-0244 for their voice to be heard.

Looks like NBC is willing to leave it up to the viewing public if Season 4 is a reality (no pun intended).

Tommy Hilfiger: PUNK!!

Tommy Hilfiger repeatedly smacks Axl Rose (Yes... THE Axl Rose of Guns n' Roses) repeatedly at a party for moving a drink.

You can't THINK stuff like this up.

Read the article

Guy Goma

This is just too funny.

This poor guy goes to the BBC to interview for a tech job and ends up live on the air being asked questions about the Apple Computer vs. Apple Records judgement.

His reaction on air is priceless. PRICELESS.



Here's the article

A Very Good SNL

Last night's SNL (Saturday, May 14th, 2006 -- I guess by Monday, "Last night" really won't work anymore) was one of the best in awhile.

The show has always been hit-or-miss. A good skit here. A bad skit there. But on a rare occasion, the entire episode can be good. Last night's was one of those episodes. The host was Julia Louie-Dreyfus and the musical guest was Paul Simon (who's looking oooooold) *.

There were two skits in particular that stood out. One was the opening with Al Gore as the President talking about how great everything's going (too much oil, huge budget surplus, friendly with all the countries in the Middle East). It was a funny skit, yet... made me kind of think "what if...". What if the 2000 election had ended up the way it SHOULD have ended up.

The other skit of note was about a class for using MySpace.com. It was funny because, with the exception of one mother who wanted to help her daughter set up an account, the rest of the class was filled with stalkers and pervs. Hysterical (yet, unfortunately, true).

* -- About Mr. Simon. I listened to his album a few times now and I think it's one of the best albums he's done in a long time. Brian Eno's production tricks definitely went a long way towards raising the bar on an already strong set of songs.

Music Ho Finally

Been a long time. Some new stuff:

Red Hot Chili Peppers - "Stadium Arcadium"



Good album. The Chili Peppers, for being a band full of white guys, can lay down some serious funk grooves. Maybe two discs a little bit overkill, but great overall.

Paul Simon - "Surprise"



I gotta listen to this some more before weighing judgement. One listen while at work didn't really help. But from what I heard, it's a great album. Definitely sounds like a traditional Paul Simon album decorated with the sonic ticks and tweaks from Brian Eno. Manages to pull a standard Simon album into new territory, like Graceland and Rhythm of the Saints. (When I picked this CD up, my wife thought Paul had recorded an album full of nursery rhymes because of the baby on the cover).

Pearl Jam



A great return for this band. I managed to keep up with them through "Yield", but lost interest as the band starting getting more interested in their own sonic noodlings than in writing good songs. This album amps the rock and volume back up and has some good, solid songs. Not as good as Ten, or Vs., or Vitology, but the best one in a long time.

John Lennon - "Live Peace In Toronto"



This is one half good album and one half challenging album. The live tracks from Lennon (with a backup band that included Eric Clapton) are loose, raw, and fun. The live tracks from Yoko Ono are challenging. It definitely supports the argument that she was a trailblazer for the avant garde, but what in the hell made her think to caterwaul and shriek through a ten minute song??

Gerry Mulligan - "Gerry Mulligan Meets Scott Hamilton: Soft Lights & Sweet Music"



Good jazz. Nothing special. Nothing remarkable. But not bad either. Very straightforward, enjoyable session. Great addition for Mulligan fans.

American Idol: Why Chris Leaving Was A Good Thing

Shock! Horror! Gasp!

America voted Chris off! Has everyone lost their minds? He was supposed to be the next American Idol!!!



(Wait... wait... okay.)

America didn't vote Chris off. America saved Chris. Had Chris been voted American Idol, his first CD would have been one of those slick, pop-oriented, written-by-committee deals that every winner has been saddled with. In other words, something completely counter to Chris' strengths. Chris will have a great career in music. Heck, the band Fuel wants him as their lead singer. But Chris' first album needs to be something full-on rock n' roll. Not ballads. Not pop. Rock. Creed. Fuel. Guns n' Roses. ROCK.

Now that he's not bound by the laws of American Idol, he'll get that freedom to do the music he was born to do.

So, thank you America -- you saved a talented one.

Choxie!

What do you think of when I say "Target" (as in the store?)

Obviously, those of you who don't have a Target in your area are thinking "Huh?". But those of you who do are thinking it's a lot like Wal-Mart, only smaller and a bit more upscale. However, you really wouldn't pin the word "gourmet" to it, would you?

Well, I've tried their new upscale candy line, Choxie, for the second time and I'm quite impressed.



The first thing I tried was some Chocolate Truffles. For such low-priced candy, it was very good. Almost on par with some of the bigger candy chains (still not as good as the ultra-gourmet stuff [Leonidas, anyone?], but good nonetheless).

Tonight, I bought a Peppermint Marbled Crunch Thin (the description -- commence drooling: "the smoothest, richest dark chocolate with a peppermint crunch and white chocolate marble swirl". Okay, wipe your chin). It tastes like a chocolate covered candy cane. Very, very tasty.

Next time you're thinking of having some candy and want something fancier with out the associated price tag, check out Choxie. You may be quite surprised.

Long Time. No Post

Wow, it's been awhile since I've posted something.

Been too busy switching positions at work to think of something witty or profound to say or to notice any sites that are of interested to post up on here.

Hey, Summer is coming so that'll be fun!

It's time for a big Music Ho post methinks.

Nintendo Wii

Nintendo Whhat?

Nintendo is renaming their latest console from Revolution, which is a great name for a game console, to Wii. The Net is abuzz with questions about how to pronounce it -- most think it will be pronounced "We" (or "Wheeeeeeee"). But you know you're gonna have some hapless customer going to Circuit City asking for the new Nintendo "Wih-ih".

At least they didn't name it the "Wii-Wii".

"Mommy, can I go play with my wii-wii??"

Laughter ensues.

More Television "HUH"?

Mick Jagger - Sitcom Star.

Yes, the Rolling Stone is filming scenes for a potential ABC comedy pilot.



I just don't get it.

News Story (via Yahoo Music)

Nine Years Of Marriage

Wow. It's now 12:23 AM on April 26th. It's my 9th wedding anniversary.

You know, a lotta people thumb their noses at marriage and the divorce rate is almost something like 50% percent. But, if you truly believe you have a soulmate out there (and I think each of us does... may not be in your hometown... might be halfway across the world), have faith you'll find them. Because when you marry your soulmate, each yeaer of marriage only gets better than the previous.

First, though, make sure you love yourself. Once you can say that you love yourself (in a positive way, not a narsicistic way), then, and ONLY then, will you be in rhythm with the universe to cross paths with your soulmate.

It's a great day!!

Cilantro - Herb Of Evil?

I like Cilantro. I like its smell and its taste and it's one of the best herbs to spruce up a dish.

My brother-in-law hates it. We think he's nuts. How could you not like Cilantro?

Well, surprise, surprise. Apparently, there's a whole community of cilantro haters.



Link

Brilliant, Absolutely Brilliant

From FoxNews.com

Parents Fake Own Son's Death

(just to get some time off from work!)

Best Actor In A Guest Starring Role

There's an Emmy category for Best Actor in a GUEST Starring Role.

I already have my nominee: Michael Emerson.

Who?

He plays Henry Gale on Lost. One of the coolest, sleaziest, slimiest villians to ever grace the screen. He's definitely help take the show to a new level. Hopefully some Dharma Initiative people are members of the TV Academy so they can vote...

Again, TV Makes You Go HUH?

American Idol.

April 5th, 2005.

Who gets voted off, despite some really weak performances from pretty-boy Ace and country-boy Bucky* ?

MANDISA.

HUH?

Yes, this may not have been her best performance, but she's one of the most consistently good singers overall. And who joined her at the bottom three? Elliott and Paris.

HUH??

Just proves this show is less a talent contest and more a popularity contest.

URGH!

* Bucky, Bucky, Bucky - shame on you. I like you, man. You are one of the most open, friendly, unassuming people. You're from North Carolina, one of my favorite states. You come across as smart, unlike your fellow Southerner Kellie. But why, oh why, oh why, did you choose a slow song on Country night? This was supposed to be YOUR night, dude. You should have picked the rip-roarin'est, gut-bustin', hootin' and a-hollerin' song you could get your hands on. You would have OWNED the night, man. Shame, shame, shame.

Dead Brain

Ever had one of those days where you don't encounter a single, useful thought?

Today is one of those days.

And that's all I can blog about.

Hey, at least Lost AND Amazing Race are on tonight!

Music Ho Time!

The latest, the greatest.

Prince - "3121"



Sounds like "Musicology" wasn't a fluke. This one's even better. Some of the songs sound like old-school Prince. Definitely one of his strongest albums in a long time. If he keeps this trend going, his next album will rank alongside Purple Rain and 1999 as an all-out classic.

David Gilmour - "On An Island"



Stately, slow, awesome. This is the best Pink Floyd album in a long time (even it wasn't recorded by Pink Floyd). Easily trumps the last two Pink Floyd albums. Gilmour sounds energized (even if the songs are very spacey and slow), the songwriting is the best he's done in a long time, and it's grown on me very quickly.

Hard-Fi - "Stars of CCTV"



Great album. One of the biggest influences you hear in many of the younger bands is the Clash. This one comes closest to capturing the Clash sound, yet enhancing it with their own beat. Imaging fusing Franz Ferdinand with the Clash and you'll get an idea what this band sounds like. Instantly likeable.

Ray Davies - "Other People's Lives"



Davies' first solo album. Gets back to the grand old days of the Kinks (like "Something Else" and "Face to Face"). I'll have to listen to this one some more before weighing in, but what I've heard was great.

T. Rex - "Electric Warrior"



The Rosetta Stone of Glam Rock. All glam rock roads lead to here. C'mon - "Bang A Gong". 'Nuff said.

I'm Savin' Daylight!!

Well, tomorrow morning at 2 AM, I get hop into my time machine and surge forward to 3 AM. Why? It's time for Daylight Savings!!

That's right. Forget saving money. Forget saving for a rainy day. Let's save daylight!! It sounds so wonderful and mystical like we're living in a land of unicorns and fairies and bright, shiny things. We're saving daylight for that day when the big, old, bad King of Dark shows up and tries to take our daylight away. Not so fast, buster. I got some daylight saved up!

Oy.

Why the hell are we still following this arcane tradition? From what I've read, daylight savings was established back in the day of Benjamin Franklin to help businessmen and farmers having an extra hour of daylight to be extra productive during the warmer summer months.

With the advent of the Internet and the fact that we all conduct business at the speed of light these days and that business is no longer predicated on the amount of sunlight, this silly nonsense of "spring ahead, fall back" is pointless and irritating. It's almost like creating your own jet lag -- it actually takes a few days to adjust to the shift. Don't believe me? Check how extra cranky and out of sorts all your co-workers are on Monday.

Hey, Arizona and Hawaii don't observe daylight savings. They haven't fallen off the earth. They've not suddenly gone into a timewarp where they're an hour behind everyone else.

It's time for a change. No more daylight savings!! Now if you'll excuse me I have to move my clock forward an hour...

VH1 I Love Toys (Continued)

Okay, I watched all five episodes of "I Love Toys" on VH1. Hysterical.

And the #1 Toy of all time???

The Hula Hoop



I am always amazed how things that are so, so, soooo simple turn out to be huge successes. Think about it - post it notes (paper squares with glue), hula hoops (a plastic ring), paper clips (a twisted length of wire); Countless more.

Sometimes I think we all think way too hard. It's the simple stuff that lasts.

Why This World Is Coming To An End

Some "artist" decided to make a statue of a naked Britney Spears giving birth to her son.

Why?

Again. Why?

Link (at your own risk. You've been warned.)

Also, some guy tried to live a week at a Wal-Mart. He only lasted 41 hours. Hahahaha. I know some people that could easily live a week at Wal-Mart.

You Wanna Screw Up Your Vision?

Paint a Panda Bear on a human hair.

Link (via BoingBoing)

It's A Gas, Gas, Gas

Gas prices here are predicted to go over $3 a gallon for regular unleaded.

No matter how look at it, that's just sick.

The Library - My Favorite Video Store

I've found a great resource for getting movies to watch -- the local library.

Sure, they may not have all the latest, greatest titles, but one of the libraries down the street has a pretty generous selection of movies all for the low, low price of nothing. I get to keep each movie at two days, which is more than enough time.

Right now, I've been on a Criterion Collection kick -- catching up on some foreign films that have been around for a while. To date I've borrowed Ikiru (a wonderful Kurosawa film about a dying man who had been a company slave most of his life trying to make make a difference in his neighborhood at the end), Eyes Without A Face (a French horror film about a scientist trying to give his disfigured daughter a new face. Surprisingly gruesome for a film from the late 50s), and Knife in the Water (Roman Polanski's first movie about a couple who go boating with a hitchhiker they pick up -- a good psychological thriller).

Tomorrow, it's off to the library again -- I think more Kurosawa is on tap.

Music Ho Time

Okay, 'nuff with rude people.

Some of the latest stuff to expand the Music Ho's musical horizon:

Janis Joplin - "Pearl" (Legacy Edition)



A classic. Joplin was one of those singers that was possessed by the music. She didn't just sing. She owned the song. The closest I've ever come to seeing that in real life was watching Melissa Etheridge on the 2005 Grammy's covering a... Janis Joplin tune! The second disc is full of tracks from her performances on the Festival Express which choogled through Canada in the early 70s.

Santana - "III" (Legacy Edition)



Another classic. The final album in a triad of classic latin-funk-rock gems from Santana (the other two being "Santana" and "Abraxas"). Again, the latin rhythm rock fusion is near-flawless. Santana's playing is incredible. I wish Santana would attempt to go back to an album like this instead of continuing with his Santana plus Special Guests style albums which have become his norm. He really needs to form a new band of trusted musicians really tear up some of the classic sound he's known for.

Arctic Monkeys - "Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I Am Not"



The single most hyped band going at the moment. Not really deserving of the almost rabid praise they've been getting, but the album's pretty darned good. Best comparison for U.S. ears is that they sound a lot like Franz Ferdinand, but must punkier. Whereas Franz F. veers more towards a disco-esque sound, the A. Monkeys go all angular and jagged, but still manage to still pull off some cool grooves and rhythms.

Boy Least Likely To - "The Best Party Ever"



Fun. Period. Very innocent, almost childlike songs full of bouncy rhythms, xylophones, etc. The opening track is a joy. Only available as an import from the U.K. but worth seeking out. Between them and The Go Team, there's some awfully fun music coming out of the U.K. the past year.

Donald Fagen - "Morph The Cat"



More incredible jazz-rock-funk from 1/2 of Steely Dan. Much more upbeat and jazzy/playful than his first two solo discs. Sounds a lot more like a logical continuation of Steely Dan's two most recent albums. If you liked those, you'll like this one. I liked those (I personally think "Everything Must Go" is one of Steely Dan's best albums), and I like this one.